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Part 2: How to Get Unstuck: Let Go of Old Hurts for Good!

Today’s post is part 2 in response to a question from one of our readers, and it’s a question I’m asked A LOT.

To Recap Here’s The Question:

Most of the hurt for me is from others. How can I use this for the hurt that’s been caused to me? I need to heal from this hurt so I can move on. I’ve tried but so far nothing has worked

There are two secrets to resolving this pattern for good.  In Part I, we learned about a simple, yet powerful, 4 Step Communication Process to have difficult conversations with easw. If you missed it, you can read it here

The second secret to letting go of old hurts is to acknowledge a simple, yet powerful truth- no one can hurt you without your permission.

I know this may seem a bit hard to swallow- but it’s true. 

It’s Not Personal

Nothing anyone ever does is because of you, it’s because of themselves- plain and simple. “Don’t take anything personally” was one of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn.

When someone’s harsh words, behaviors or actions appear to be directed at you, it feels like it’s 100% about you. Add in emotions like hurt, sadness or anger and the situation feels even MORE real and personal.

You can actually exercise a great deal of choice over how you feel.

We’ve all felt bad from time to time. But there’s no reason you need to ever feel bad for more than a few minutes. That’s right, you don’t have to keep reliving that hurtful conversation over and over again in your head. You can let it go for good.

Exercise Choice

Exercising choice comes from awareness. Exercising choice is a practice. Similar to building your muscles at the gym, at first it may be a bit hard to lift weights, or do 30 minutes of cardio. But the more you practice the easier it is.

With more and more awareness, choice becomes natural. So the more you’re aware of your feelings, the easier it becomes to choose them. Your feelings will no longer hit you like a tidal wave, you’ll build enough awareness to see them coming from a mile away.

So If you’re attracted to situations or people that you don’t want over and over again, it’s usually happening outside your awareness.

Click here to download your free 4-step Ultimate Communication Guide now!

The more you cultivate your awareness the easier it is to change. What you’ll find is that when you don’t take things personally, you’ll be able to maintain your inner peace no matter what and you’ll no longer attract situations or people that cause drama in your life.

And remember if you’re new at this, it may feel a bit uncomfortable at first, but with practice you’ll be pro in no time at all.

Please leave a comment below or send me an email and let me know how you’re transforming old hurts for good.  

© 2016 Lori A. Ostenfeld All Rights Reserved.

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